Be Careful What You Wish For

I have a date. On Sunday.

There's a guy on match.com who seems alright, and he asked me out. It was actually really cute. He gave me 3 options based on what he thought I might like and let me choose. I chose coffee (the simplest one). He's a music teacher and he seems funny and quick so it will probably be a good time.

Then why do I feel so miserable?

I have everything I've ever wanted. I have a Fake Boyfriend to talk to on the phone or via FB and I have a real, living, breathing, date. I have the best of both worlds! Right?

I wasn't even going to reply to the witty, thoughtful date message, but then my Fake Boyfriend said he was going to go on a date, so I should too. And he's right, of course I should go....

Old Tricia would be dancing around the room with glee over this situation! Ugh. Who is this New Tricia, and what has she done with my dating philosophies?!

On a brighter note Ma got some test results back and they were normal, which is good. We haven't won the war, but we've won a battle. When I found out I took these huge, deep breaths....It felt like I hadn't even been breathing for a full day, like I'd just come up from underwater.

All of this is good, right?

I don't know what to think.